Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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