It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
