p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
