No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
