let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I think your dad took our porno
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
