You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
