very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
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