I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
