He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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