Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
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