so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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