I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
