I love black thongs
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
His nipple licking is glorious
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