Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
