I just pynch a tree in the face
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
