whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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