wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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