so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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