put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
