if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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