scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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