jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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