Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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