My girlfriend figured out who you are.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
