i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize