Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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