Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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