I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
