I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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