apparently the secret to your success is patron
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Randomize
