This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
