did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize