I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
