People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Alive.
So much puke
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize