Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
FUCK WHALES
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
