he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
