so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
