OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize