You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
