I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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