Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
