whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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