I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
