I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize