That reminds me...we need to get swords
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
