38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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