So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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