I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
