Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
