my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
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